Embracing Our Worth

Posted on by

What does it mean to be worthy? Let’s take a closer look at that word: worthy. It’s defined as being valuable, deserving respect, precious, admirable and praiseworthy. Concentrate on these words; meditate on their meaning. You are worthy! Worthiness is the essence of your being and it will never leave you. It’s not based on externals such as family background, attractiveness, race, socioeconomic status, how others treat you, etc. It is who we truly are and always will be. Each of us is unique and special. We all have individual gifts and talents to share with the world. We all have significance and value to add to the world’s collective experience. Don’t allow anyone to fool you into believing that you don’t deserve to be treated with respect, love and consideration. Don’t allow anyone in your life who insists on devaluing, belittling or acting violently toward you. Know and embrace your worthy and valuable self in all situations, with all people and at all times!

How do we begin to honor ourselves and recognize our worth? We start by consciously changing our beliefs about ourselves. We must begin to affirm our worth and value. Don’t wait for others to praise and affirm you; affirm the gloriousness of your creation and the miracle of your being every day. At first it may seem contrived and fake, but take quiet time every day to affirm that you are a beloved creation of God–born worthy and valuable. Sit with this thought, mediate on it daily, and allow this truth to resonate deeply within you.  Unplug from what others think of you, and instead focus on what you believe about yourself. Don’t focus on your accomplishments, family status or other externals; instead focus on the miracle of your being and the excellence of your creator. You were created with power, purpose and a destiny. You can fulfill that destiny by living authentically. We all know people who don’t fit the typical standards of beauty, intelligence, net worth, etc., yet they live extraordinary lives that reflect their worth and value. They radiate joy and a zest for life, they are kind to others, and they move with a quiet confidence. These individuals are living authentically because they’ve cultivated a knowledge of their worth and value from within rather than from without.

Next, ask yourself what you like to do and what you’re good at—these are your gifts and talents. Spend more time developing these skills and interests. At the very least you’ll enjoy your life as you discover new hobbies and pursuits. It’s also possible that they may lead to more fulfilling work–allowing you to work from your passion instead of in pursuit of a paycheck. This practice is a worthy exploration of self. It shifts our focus from the external and material and instead sets our sights on our true value. Put your precious energy into developing your inner self instead of fixating on your outer self. The well-kept secret is that your true worth and beauty are found within. Your body may change over time, your net worth can fluctuate, but you will always have the power to show up authentically and be your true self. As we recognize our value, we become more powerful in the art of living.

Relationships

Posted on by

There’s been a lot in the news recently on the subject of unconscious relationships and the destruction and violence that plague them.  Just turn on the TV and you’ll be inundated by crime scene footage and courtroom battles between spouses, lovers and friends.  I always wonder what happened to the love and connection that once was.  Our justice system and society in general are intent on defending the victim and punishing the perpetrator.  But, is it really that simple?  Is there something in the way that we relate to one another that may be a recipe for disaster?  I think so, and I believe it’s an issue of consciousness. 

Romantic relationships today appear to be very unconscious.  Many people partner for very selfish reasons–we’re focused on getting our emotional, physical and sexual needs met.  We may be bored, lonely, sexless, etc., and want to fill that need.  Along the path, we meet someone who satisfies our basic criteria and we then delude ourselves into thinking that we’re ready for a “hook up” or that we’ve found “the one”–someone special to share our lives with.  But, for the most part, all of this maneuvering is about us! 

In conscious relationships, we work to balance our needs with the needs and concerns of our partner.  We don’t take advantage of them sexually, emotionally, financially, etc., in an effort to get ahead and make life more comfortable and enjoyable for ourselves.  We don’t exploit the people in our lives–we don’t take more than we give.  We love and care for our partners emotionally and physically in a way that is mutually beneficial.  I say we, but I’m a work in progress.  Every day I work to be more consciously connected and more authentic in my interactions. My life is changing; I have more peace and more honest relating in my life than ever before. 

When relationships are ill-conceived, unconscious and unbalanced, people do crazy things.  They can be violent, verbally abusive, vindictive and lethal.  They are literally out of their minds!  That’s really the truth; they’re not awake and aware.  They are unconsciously reacting from impulse and fear, and that’s what we see played out on TV.  If we don’t take the time to be present and conscious in all of our creations, especially in relationships, we can most likely expect volatility in our lives.  When we exploit others in an effort to get our needs met, we create an environment that is ripe for hostility, resentment and sometimes violence.  We must take the time to get to know our potential partner, and we must actively contribute to the well-being of our relationship.  We’ve got to find a way to balance our needs with the needs of our partner in a way that is respectful, honorable and compassionate.  Don’t mislead and take from others.  Don’t tell people what you think they want to hear to gain access to their body, money, status, good opinion, etc.  If you do this, there will be a price to pay.  It could be the currency you eventually pay in divorce court, child support, alimony, palimony, dysfunctional living, a disgraced reputation, incarceration, and so on.  You can’t fool life; and there are no shortcuts to living well.  So, let’s step up and be honest (no games), let’s pay attention to our needs and the needs of our partner, and let’s work on our issues with the help of a therapist if necessary.  In other words, let’s GROW.  That’s the path to consciously creating your life and creating lasting, fulfilling and loving relationships. 

Partners in Consciousness

Posted on by

Oprah’s Lifeclass & Consciousness


Oprah’s new lifeclass is all about consciousness and living life deliberately.  She and Iyanla share many tools that will help us understand and overcome the anger, resentment, fear and depression that rob us of our joy.  

View the video and see what you think.  There are plenty of useful exercises and tools to help us uncover the truth and find peace in our journey to live more joy-filled and awesome lives! 

Click here & check it out: http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/oprahs-lifeclass-webcast.html

A Conscious Walk

Posted on by

What is conscious living?  What does it mean to live a conscious life?  Well, for me, consciousness refers to being deliberate and intentional–in short, it means to be aware.  I like this approach to life because it asks that we make our day-to-day decisions from a place of authenticity, instead of relying on our socialization and the status quo.  Consciousness empowers us and insists that we move through our days awake and aware, understanding our true selves and in command of our minds and our emotions.  It allows us to create friendships, relationships, accept work and build careers, advance our education and create our lives in the empowered state of wakefulness.  Further, we make decisions and take action only after we contemplate and accept the impact they will have on not just us, but also others and the world in which we  live.

Wow, I know that sounds complicated, but it’s what’s required if we are to build lives of fulfillment and satisfaction.  Today’s statistics suggest that our old approach to living isn’t working for us.  We’re suffering mentally and physically from lives that aren’t well lived, and we seem to be very uncomfortable in our own skin.  Just take a look:  Annually, approximately 17 million Americans experience some form of depression, with women being twice as likely to suffer depression than men; nearly half (about 43%) of first-time marriages in the U.S. end in divorce; thirty-three percent of all families with children younger than 18 are headed by a single parent–usually a female; and last year, 9.5 million cosmetic procedures were preformed in the U.S., with breast augmentation as the most popular procedure.

What’s going on?  It seems to me that we’re making a lot of unconscious choices that result in difficult and depressing lives.  We’re going through the motions of living without taking the time to get to know ourselves and our authentic interests and values.  Our minds are congested with thoughts of getting ahead, making enough money, acquiring the extras, appearing successful to others, having the perfect weddings and vacations, rearing the smartest and most beautiful children, enhancing our own beauty, achieving perfect health gained through the “miracle pill,” and the list goes on and on.  There’s a lot of striving going on, and most of it is about keeping up appearances and living the so-called “good life.”  It doesn’t seem to be working for us, and we’re paying the price with a kind of discomfort and dis-ease that we can’t seem to shake off.

So, what’s the fix?  How do we bring more joy and fulfillment into our lives?  That’s what I’d like to explore with this blog.  It’s a search that I’ve been on for the past decade or so of my life.  I’ve made a lot of progress, but I have to admit that it isn’t easy–at least it hasn’t been for me.  I’m a product of my socialization and environment, and let’s just say that I have one foot in the “old world” and one in this “new world.”  I’m a little uncomfortable and off-balance sometimes, but my happiness and overall satisfaction with life are growing more and more each day, as I make conscious everyday choices that reflect the values and ideas which have meaning and importance to me authentically.  If that outcome resonates as valuable to you, then I invite you to visit my blog often and get involved in the discussion.  I don’t have all the answers, but I can share some of the questions and issues that I’ve contemplated, the books and articles that I’ve read and many of my experiences and observations to help others along in their journey.  Most of what I write will be focused on the female perspective because that’s what I know, and it’s a journey in which I’m keenly interested.

I am sure that the discoveries we make together will uplift, inspire and empower you–body, mind and soul.

Thanks for your participation 🙂